Disappointment

Disappointment

1- Expectations versus reality

Every one of us has expectations for life. We have them for marriage, for our jobs, for health and for our friendships. When what we want out of life does not match what we got out of life we become frustrated. We become disappointed.

Disappointment happens when our reality does not reach our expectations.  Our mettle (courage or fortitude) will be tested when we do not receive the medal (achievements or awards) we wanted or thought we deserved.

2- Others are watching

US gymnast Nastia Liukin won top place in the uneven bars at the Beijing Olympics. But Nastia did not receive the gold medal for her achievement–rather, she had to settle for the silver.  The judges had a tie between her and the Chinese gymnast. In past Olympics both athletes would have received a gold medal. The rules were changed for this Olympics and based on the tiebreaker, which seemed very obscure, the American would have to settle for second place.

As I watched these events unfold I wondered how incredibly tough it must have been. You have worked most all of your life for this moment, it ends in a tie, and you’re awarded the silver medal. The cameras kept a close eye on the reaction of this teenage girl. Nearly 1,000,000,000 people would wait and to see her response.

When I deal with disappointment I typically may have a handful of people that are observing. I could not imagine the pressure that was on this young girl. She had the world watching her. While she may have responded with a sense of bewilderment and confusion I was amazed with the attitude she displayed.

3- Our response to disappointment

We rejoice in our disappointments because we know that the pain of disappointment produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:3-5

Paul, the author of the book of Romans, knows a lot about disappointment. In these verses he teaches us what to do when things do not turn out as planned.

First, he lets us know that we must keep moving forward.  The key word here is perseverance. To persevere means to stay the course in spite of your disappointments. Those who do so are inspiration to others.

Second, he lets us know that we must keep growing. The key word here is character. There is an ever-present temptation to try to take shortcuts to reach the goal. Any shortcut you take will eventually be found out and will cause you to be disqualified.(Think of how many Olympic would-have-beens never got to be because they tried to take a shortcut with steroids, etc.

Finally, Paul lets us know that we must keep believing.  The key word here is hope. No matter how impossible the task at hand, they must never give up. In one of Winston Churchill’s most famous speech he delivered one simple phrase, “Never, never, never give up!”  These words were given to a college graduating class during the height of despair, as London was daily bombed by the German Air Force.

Others are watching, how will you respond?

To listen to the message I spoke this past Sunday entitled “Pain of Disappointment” you may click here.